“What the heck was that?” Adam asked The Badger. “You take charge and the next thing we get is some absurdist scene break about someone taking a shower? Besides, didn’t I write that ridiculous short story ages ago just to fill some space?”
The Badger took a look at Adam, knowing that he didn’t need to answer because Adam was undoubtedly going to use the narration to go off on some tangent about things which were already explained in the dialogue, while also making people sigh a bunch.
“I still need more time,” The Badger sighed.
Meanwhile, in Edinburgh, a twenty-seven year old Jessica Trelawnty was staring at the TV while dressed in a pink tank top and black yoga pants, transfixed by the news coming out of America. She had been on her way to the bathroom for a shower when she overheard her television talking about how there were two monsters currently roaming through the center of a small town called Exposition.
However, that’s not what had caused her to pause on her path. Instead, it was the discussion of two men who were found at the scene of both beasts, who appeared to have appeared out of thin air. Even more intriguing was the video of these two men. One of them, at one point, had managed to be hit by a car, only to stand up as though nothing had happened, and the other somehow lost every single one of his limbs, and his torso, becoming nothing more than a head, only to come back bigger and stronger than before.
And then, they ran off in the car together, as though they were old cohorts.
Jessica knew something fishy was up, and she knew that whatever it was, it had to do with these two obviously guilty men. And Jessica also knew that she was the one who had to take care of it. After all, she was the world’s foremost paranormal investigator. Well, she assumed she was. There actually wasn’t much of a governing body for paranormal investigators due to how most of the world believed them to be nothing more than scam artists, but she had put those words on her business cards and no one had actually taken the time to refute it, so she figured it must have some form of truth to it.
And besides, she had been the one who had actually gone into that creepy house in Dunwich and determined there were cultist activities which had somehow managed to create creatures who gave off their own light through a mysterious thing that she had decided to call bioluminescence.
She later learned that bioluminescence was an actual thing, but she swears she had never heard the word before she had come up with it and thinks she deserves a little bit of extra credit because of that.
Jessica hopped onto the next plane out of Edinburgh and made her way to Exposition.
It wasn’t a direct flight, obviously.
Actually, she ended up on a small commuter plane into Dublin, which then put her on yet another small plane into Paris, which she then had some trouble because she didn’t speak French and she had to somehow get across the airport in order to find the terminal that would get her onto her flight into Chicago, which then was just another brief 3 hour flight to Exposition.
But, after all of that, she was finally there. Exposition, America. The land of, well, the land of something weird.
And so it was that Jessica found herself standing at the feet of two enormous monsters who were now looking like they were about to face off against each other, as she also found herself standing face to face with the two men from the video that she knew would answer all of her questions.
“Good, you’re here,” The Badger said to Jessica. “We need you to answer some questions for us.”
Jessica found herself wishing she had taken the time to change out of her yoga pants and into some more serious clothing.