I’m going to admit something that I’m not entirely proud of…
I have been so crazily busy these past few months that I fear the amount of time I’ve spent actually mentally anticipating the arrival of the third little Oster to our clan has been way too minimal.
That’s not to say I’m not excited for the new addition to the familial group. In fact, it couldn’t be farther from the truth. I can’t wait for the little bugger to get out here and let me hold him for countless hours while passing out on the couch because he’s kept me awake all night with his screaming…I love that crap, even if it’s completely exhausting.
But there’s also a bit of apprehension in the mix. With how busy things have been lately, I feel as though I’ve barely gotten to spend any real quality time with the two kids I’ve already got. Last night I had to squeeze in a 30 second cuddle session with my daughter in order to get my needed snuggles. I did the same with my son for the few minutes this morning before I absolutely HAD to get out of bed and start the day (he likes to come into the bedroom about an hour before it’s time to get up…mostly to beg to have the TV turned on).
These few minutes haven’t been nearly enough with my adorable little munchkins…and the arrival of a third probably won’t make things much better.
I’m nervous about how the third kid will change the climate of our household. Right now, things are pretty well normalized…there’s the crazed emotions of a three year old boy which are driving all of us nuts, but outside of that, we’re pretty well set in a solid routine. My kids are awesome with babies, and I really have no fears that my son, who loves to attack and tackle everything, will be anything more than perfectly gentle with his little brother…at least for the first few days.
But change is coming…and I’m not sure I’m rested enough to be prepared for it.
Of course, I also realize that I had these same fears going into becoming a two-child family, and they were all but completely unwarranted. My darling daughter was absolutely perfect upon the arrival of her first brother, and with how much these two love babies, I see no reason to truly believe things to be different.
But he’s coming…and he’s coming soon. And I find it difficult to think about him coming, because, well, right now, the best I get from him is those few moments where I’m actually able to hang out with my wife and he and I get to play a little game of tag. I love those moments, but they’re so few and far between, and the just remind me of how great it is to get a little kicker in your arms, even if he’s screaming bloody murder because he’d much prefer to hang out with the parent of the other gender…you know, the one with the boobs.
Actually…that part does make me quite anxious. My daughter and I have always shared a pretty awesome bond. From the first day we brought her home (she was quite crabby the entire time we were in the hospital, probably due to the lack of sleep allowed with the feeding schedule the nurses had her on) she and I could hang out for hours upon hours without her having any real interest in the mom…unless it was time to eat, then she was done with me, but even then it wasn’t a real issue, just an attempt to get something from me that I truly couldn’t provide.
The boy, on the other hand, had absolutely no interest in me most of the time. He’s always been a momma’s boy and I was never good enough (that changes from time to time now that he’s older, but I’m pretty sure he still prefers the mom).
If the kid doesn’t like me, I don’t have much I can offer to make that better…if the kid likes me, at least my wife can still be the one with the food. If the kid doesn’t like me, I’m just the one who is really good at putting them to sleep…
Anyways…I’m excited…and nervous…anxious and eager…about this new child in our life. I want him in my arms…
I just hope I can keep up on my sleep as well 😉
Anyhoo, I’ve got a bunch of stuff to get through today. I hope you all have a fantastic Tuesday, and…of course…have fun out there!